Because she has touched me so deeply in so many ways, I decided to dedicate a post to quotes and anecdotes proclaimed by our sweet girl.  My hope is to give you a clearer picture into who she is and how much she has already changed in the few months since she joined us.  Her fire and spirit feed my soul and renew my vigor to advocate all the more for older child adoption.  Heavily educated and prepared older child adoption…mind you, but all of these children deserve the opportunity to discover themselves and the potential laying latent inside of them.  They are all different, bound for different places in life with different abilities and handicaps, but have amazing journeys to embark on if given the chance.  I know they all have the potential to touch the world in their own special ways.  Raising Anaia, or any child for that matter, is not for the faint of heart.  It is completely exhausting both emotionally and physically.  But it is amazing, let me show you why…

Translated into English just for you:

“Mama, you work so hard.  I want to help you.  What can I do?”

“I am your gift from God…your precious gift- you are mine, you know?”

“Mama, you are extraordinary.  All the food you make is very good and you make it every day for us.  I love all the food you make.  You also teach us- you are a good teacher.  You care about us doing well.  Then you wash our clothes and give us what we need.  Wow.  You are extraordinary.  When I grow up, I want to be like you.  I want to take care of you.  I will go to college and get a good job so I can take care of you and dad.  You can live with me.  I will do everything for you like you do for me now.”

Every time I leave the house for more than 1 hour, I come home to a gift wrapped in pretty paper from Anaia.  It is usually a necklace or bracelet she has made for me.  Written on the top is a message, “Mama, I love you.  Thank you. Anaia.” 

Every day Anaia comes in a makes our bed for us.  The other day, this is what she had to say.  “I like to give you gifts mama.  You do everything for me, you take good care of all of us, teach us, cook for us, wash our clothes, buy what we need.  I like to give you gifts.  Making your bed every day is a gift, right?  (Background: as a family we drew names this Christmas and then had to decide what special gift of service could be given to this person as a Christmas gift.  It needed to be something that would truly help the person.)  I can’t make daddy bracelets and necklaces…he would look strange.  So if I make the bed every day, I am giving him a gift too right?”

“I need to stop being a “squirrelly girl” and study.  I need to go to college so I can take care of mom and dad.”

Whether it be PB&J or her favorite Chinese dish, Anaia has started a new tradition of saying, “Thank you mama” when she sits down to eat  at each and every meal.  Not to be outdone, I now enjoy a chorus of thanks from the whole troop.

“I am God’s daughter.  He loves me.  He brought me here because He loves me.  You are God’s daughter too, right?  We are both God’s children.  That makes me happy.”

“I think God is happy when He sees me make your bed.  He knows my heart is happy and I am helping you.  That makes God’s heart happy too.”

Told to anyone who will pause and listen: 

          “Mama says that I am very smart.  I can do many things and do a good    job.  Mama knows that I am smart.”

          “I am special.  I am extraordinary.  My mama tells me so.”

“Daddy, I want to pray.  Thank you Jesus- you gave me my family.  You gave me Your love.  I love you Jesus.  Thank you Jesus for your love.  Thank you for my mama, my daddy, my sisters.  Help Xu Chen jiejie in China.  I miss her.  Help me have a happy heart.  Amen.”

In English: “Mama, I like-a my hair.  I like-a you do my hair.  You do a good job!  You make-a braids.  Good job mama!  I like-a!”  Then she parades around like a princess at a ball…

“I am a “squirrelly girl” and you love me.  You love your squirrelly girl!  When I yell or do bad things, you still love me.  I know I am your precious gift.”

Countless times per day: “Kiss me!!!”  “Hug me!!!”  (Now requested in both Chinese and English!)

“Mama, you are pretty!”  (That one never gets old…)

“Mama you need to rest.  You need SLEEP.”  (Not sure how to take that one, but she is insightful…) The other day it was followed up with, “You do too many things for us, I want to rub your back, pleeeease?????”  Now we’re talking!

She is always opening the dishwasher and peering inside…she asks, “Clean mama, c-leeean?”  If I look and say yes, she immediately starts putting them away.  I want to point out that this is the same child who had COMPLETE meltdowns when she first came home at the mere mention of putting her clothes in the hamper or throwing away her own napkin after dinner…

To a friend also recently adopted from China: “America is amazing.  I love America.  I love American food.  I love my American family.  I am an American child.”

“Look-a mama!  Look what I did!  I did it by myself!”

“We have a big family.  I like-a big family!”

Also told to a friend:  “My mama takes care of me.  I have a cold.  She gives me medicine.  American medicine is not like Chinese medicine.  I tell mom I don’t want to take it, but I really do.  American medicine tastes good.  Mama makes me feel better. It is her job.  She likes her job.”

“I cute! Mama, I cute!!!”

The only things that tops that one is… “Mama, I love you!!!  I LOVE YOU!!!!!”

This extraordinary girl has only been home for 3 ½ months.  Believe me I know when someone is just trying to win brownie points- what this girl is articulating comes straight from her heart.  It is written all over her face and visible for anyone near her to see.  Yes, there are times like when I asked the girls to remove the snow from the porch while they were playing outside and she hid around the corner to avoid detection…or when I sent them outside to play and wear off some massive amounts of pent up energy and she hid underneath the deck because she didn’t want to exert herself- just like any other normal kid.  But that is my point.  Inside and underneath the protection layers piled on from years of abuse and neglect, there is this shining star.  And boy can she shine.  Anyone who has met her can tell you she has this, “Everybody take your places…I have arrived,” persona about her.  She knows she has value, although it is tattered and jumbled, it is there and she feels it.   There is so much LIFE bubbling out of her every minute of every day.  Some of it is “life” I’d rather miss the opportunity of witnessing…but it is awe-striking to see it spew forth none-the-less.  She knows she has been “short-changed” and that it is not her fault.  It defies logic but she truly understands that it is not her doing, even if she doesn’t understand the complex circumstances that caused her abandonment.  I love her “grab onto life and shake it for all it’s worth philosophy.  She’s not afraid to try anything…which can be a good thing and a not-so-good thing, but she lives full force 24/7.  She squeezes every drop out of every day.  I was using an illustration I grabbed from church and modified last Sunday afternoon:  Picture yourself as this lamp.  (I had a lamp with me).  God is the power source (pointed to the electrical outlet).  Once you know Christ, you are connected to the power source (I plugged the lamp in).  What happens?  (Nothing.)  Why didn’t anything change for the lamp?  Answer: Because it is not turned on…  Correct!  Simply knowing Jesus does not transform who you are until you allow Him to change who you are and how you think.  If you don’t use the power source, there is no increased function.  You can’t provide light in the darkness unless you use the power you are supplied with.  The power is always there, and once you connect, you don’t lose the connectivity, but it is useless unless you decide to turn yourself on and listen to what He is trying to tell you.  Remember the conversation when Anaia talked about God having a happy heart because she was being helpful with a happy heart?  It happened the day after this illustration was given.  She had been voluntarily going in and making our bed for days prior, but I think it all clicked as to why she now had a change of heart and actually ENJOYED doing it for us.  She is connected and turned on.  Her heart is so open.  It leaves me humbled at the feet of my all-powerful creator.  Who else could weave this story?  Who else could protect this precious heart?  Only the God who created it. 

That is why I am writing this post.  To encourage those currently doing battle for these at-risk kids…for those feeling called to bring a child home.  Be prepared.  It is not going to be easy- actually, very likely quite the opposite.  The enemy is lurking and He knows adoption is the very heart of God.  You will be stretched and challenged.  You will be tested.  But you will triumph because God is with you.  You will not face these struggles alone- if you tried, you would surely fail.  You have the All-Powerful holding you in his grasp, allow His strength carry you through and you will jump on the most extraordinary ride…one that will bring you to your knees and cause your heart to leap for joy.  One that will allow you to look directly into the face of Jesus and see His love.

                   “When we recognize the face of Jesus reflected in the faces we may never see until the resurrection-those of the vulnerable unborn and unwanted-we’re doing more than cultural activism.  We are contending for the faith once for all the delivered to the saints.” –Adopted For Life, by Russell D. Moore